Grindr Experience Gone Too Far
Sex & Relationships |  Source: L. Smith, Shutterstock

Grindr Experience Gone Too Far

Get catfished or nah?

It's 10 PM on a Saturday night and I'm hanging out with friends in our dorm. We talk about past sex experience and relationships, but I was the only virgin there. They keep saying how I need to lose my virginity and put myself out there.

I decided why not? Let me try to put myself out there and get a relationship. Who knows, I may find the right somebody.

I decided to download Grindr and create a profile. I like guys and my friends can tell that I'm a bottom because of my slim-straight physique with a nice butt. They want a guy to tap my ass and rock my world. After finishing up my profile, I was shocked to see a number of messages I received. Some guys wanted to take my virginity and some to take me out on a date. These guys were older, around thirty or forty years old, and tried to get with me, but I play hard to get.

There was one guy that caught my interest, a twenty-something-year-old named Mikey. He was in college, so I definitely took interest in him. His profile pic shows he's a guy with a nice jawline and brown hair. He's my type for sure. We started talking, and then he asked me to go on a coffee date.

source: picturingtheamericas.com

A date or anything with coffee is a yes. We both exchanged numbers and set up a time to meet.

The next day, after my classes were over, I walked to Marshall Street and down to Cafe Kubal. As I wait, he texts me to come outside so we can meet, and told me what he was wearing. He was wearing a purple sweatshirt and blue pants. So, I walked out of the coffee shop and down the street to meet him in the parking lot, I walked very slowly to meet him, because I was anxious, I thought this was my moment.

This did not happen like I had imagined it.

Mikey looked like a forty-year old who just gotten out of jail. He had a nice haircut with tattoos everywhere, and he did not look like the picture on Grindr. I was totally catfished.

I immediately walked in the other direction. He messaged me, "Where are you?", but I didn't respond. I blocked him and then deleted my Grindr profile.

I learned a valuable lesson from this: never meet people online, because you will get catfished.

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5 Things I've Learned From Working In Corporate

It's not like "Beauty and the Briefcase".

At the beginning of the summer, I was ecstatic to have two part-time internships at established companies. I felt like I would be the next Andrea Sachs. I loved thinking about decorating my desk, strutting into the office with a Starbucks in hand and getting those biweekly direct deposits.

Four weeks later, and I'm looking forward to the end of my internships, because I'll have time to be a nineteen year old college student during the summer--free of a forty-hour work week commitment. With that said, I'm grateful for the experience. I've learned a lot, made mistakes and discovered some aspects of what I do and don't want as a career.

If you're interning this summer, you can probably relate to these five things I determined from working in corporate:

It's not as glamorous as it appears on television.

Movies and TV shows have the tendency of making the office environment seem very appealing and enticing with hot men and women, classy outfits and exciting drama. However, I've quickly realized that this image distorts reality (like many things on screens do these days). Eight hour days are not my definition of "fun". Unpaid 30-minute lunches are a high luxury. Most days, I'd rather be rocking my classic college look. And no, I've never heard of any steamy office hook ups.

It really is all about money.

I never understood how important money is to people and companies until I worked a job in corporate. Numbers are super valuable, and I'm not talking about the low ones in my bank account. Revenue, profit, debt, etc. are what's on people's minds constantly in corporate. Nearly every decision made in any company happens with money at the center of attention. It doesn't seem right, but I suppose that's just how it is for businesses to thrive and people to make a living. I don't think anyone has the power to change that.

You can't escape the hierarchy or cliques.

You may have tricked yourself into thinking that middle school, high school and even college cliques would magically disappear post-college graduation. I hate to break the news that they won't. In corporate, I've concluded that most workers in each department stick to themselves; there's not a lot of integration among company workers on the whole. Plus, the sense of hierarchy is palpable in the office. People talk to higher-ups differently than they do to those below them or equal to them. Someone from senior management who treats people working under them with respect is one of the best things you can find in a working professional. I wish we could find them more frequently.

Interns don't have much say.

I agree that you get out of it what you put into it when it comes to internships, but I also think that corporate companies over all don't care too much about what interns have to say. They say they want fresh voices and innovation, yet simultaneously don't want to change their ways or take risks. It's been rewarding seeing some of my ideas implemented, but, at the same time, it's also disappointing, because I want to contribute more and feel like I'm incapable of that.

There's no rush.

Working in corporate gives me a smack in the face as to this is what I will most likely be doing for 40 years plus after college. That terrifies me. We're in a world that tells kids to not grow up too fast, but to also do things to prepare them for the "real world". I honestly think squeezing lemonade and waiting tables prepped me almost as much as working in corporate has. I may take a break from it next summer and do something more fun and exciting, for there will be countless office days in the further future. Enjoy being a student while you can!

Everyone's different. You may discover you love working in corporate and that it's your dream. You may find a company that treats their employees very well. As for me, I'm starting to brainstorm freelance opportunities and earning money through genuine passions of mine that don't involve a stuffy corporate environment.

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My Tinder Date Gone Wrong

Should've swiped left.

Going out on a date with a Tinder match is pretty hit or miss. Sometimes you have a great time with your online dating cutie...other times, not so much.

This particular experience happened to me a year ago. I go to a really small college, so Tinder was a good way to meet students from other local colleges. One guy in particular caught my eye with his muscular profile picture, so I swiped right.

Even better, he was also capable of writing complete sentences with only minimal typos, which is a wonder nowadays. I hadn't planned on meeting him so quickly, but when a friend ditched me last minute for her boyfriend (a major friendship no-no, ladies) I accepted his offer to go out.

I met with him at a local spot after letting two friends know of my location and promising to text them every five minutes to make sure I was safe. I had been on other Tinder dates, and they had all been great, so I expected this one to be the same. WRONG.

First off, I couldn't even find him because he looked NOTHING like his profile picture. He looked older and was BALD. I don't have anything against bald people, but this was completely unexpected and off-putting.

He insisted on commenting on how uncomfortable I looked.

"Wow, you really must not like me," he would say. "Why do you look so uncomfortable?"

Okay dude, first of all you are making it way worse by commenting on it. This is most definitely not how to date in college. I kept shrugging him off, trying to play it cool. I wanted to go home asap, and began plotting my escape. He suggested we move to a different bar, and he asked if I would hold his hand on the walk there. I politely declined. I'm really not a touchy-feely person, and I had known him for maybe ten minutes.

Like a major jerk, he proceeded to insist he was offended I didn't want to hold his hand. Defeated, I held his jerk hand on the walk to the next place.

Once there, we sat and chatted. I convinced myself he might be okay after all. That is, until his hand found itself on my thigh. Completely freaked, I laughed and brushed it off. This just got a lot more dangerous. He continued to touch me for a few more minutes, and I kept brushing him off. At one point he mentioned getting a hotel room to go back to. Um, no.

I had enough. "I have to be up early tomorrow, and I'm really tired. I should go home."

He disagreed, but ultimately consented to walking me back to my dorm. I panicked, not wanting him to know where I lived. Instead, I stopped us at a different dorm and he insisted on kissing me goodnight. I was completely terrified now, and just wanted to get rid of him. I let him kiss me and quickly pushed him away, claiming to be very tired.

I rushed inside and stayed there until I knew he was gone. This was by far the worst date I have ever been on. The moral of the story is, ladies, don't ditch your girlfriends, and dudes please don't be creepy.

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10 Ways To Tell You're Being Catfished

All the signs you should look for when you're online dating.

We've all seen Nev and Max. We've all sat in our living rooms thinking "Are you serious? He/she is SO FAKE."

Sometimes it's so obvious to tell when someone is being fake when we're on the outside looking in.

But are you online dating? Have you been catfished and feel like a total idiot? Don't worry. Here are 10 ways to tell you're being catfished:

1. If he "went to Harvard," but doesn't have a job.
There are way too many guys sitting on online dating sites who claim to have gone to Harvard. I know there aren't that many people in my area who all just happen to have gone to Harvard. It's especially fishy if they claim to have a degree from a prestigious university and they're unemployed. (See point number 6)

2. If all his pictures are group photos or photos from far away.
If it's tough to tell which person is the one you're talking to in their photos, you're more than likely being catfished. It's much easier to pretend to be someone you're not if you use all group photos from pretty far away.

3. If he refuses to call you on the phone.
Listening to someone's voice is one of the better ways to get to know them. If they refuse to talk to you on the phone, they might be of the opposite gender. We've all seen MTV's Catfish, where someone who doesn't want to talk on the phone is trying everything they can to keep from exposing themselves via their voice.

4. If his video chat "never works."
This is one of the easiest ways to tell you're being catfished. If he's refusing to video chat with you and claims it's because his video chat "isn't working," he's catfishing you. It's the 21st century. He could find a way.

5. If he doesn't have Snapchat.
Literally everyone has Snapchat. If he doesn't, I'd question his legitimacy. If he can't download it on his smartphone, I'd really start to question whether or not he's real.

6. If they ask you for money.
Do not EVER send money to someone you've met online. Those who ask for money from someone they've never met are simply trying to scam people into getting money.

7. If their job requires them to travel all over the world and they're never close enough to you to meet.
It's easy to use this excuse as a reason not to meet you. If their claiming they have a job that requires them to travel too much to meet you, they're traveling too much to have a relationship with you as well.

8. If they look like they could be mildly famous or they're just too good looking to be real.
People love to use fake photos. If the photos look fake, they are. Do NOT trust photos that look too good to be a real person, taken with a smartphone.

9. If they seem too good to be true.
Is there just too much about them that's perfect? Is there just no way that there's nothing wrong with them? Yeah. Too good to be true. Don't lie to yourself. If your gut says it's fake, IT'S FAKE.

10. If you have a funny feeling in your gut.
Trust your intuition. If you don't feel good about it, it's not a good situation. Run. Fast.

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3 Fitness IG Accounts That ACTUALLY Teach You About Fitness

#fitspo #fitness #fitchicks #instafit #bootygains

The "fitness" industry has taken Instagram by storm... and has unfortunately become swamped with athletes posting pictures of their butts, displaying a conveniently placed supplement product in the background and repeatedly telling you to use their 15 percent discount code when buying said supplement.

Because that's obviously related to a picture of their butt. #fitness

With the rise of one sport, bodybuilding, there are also millions of competitors out there documenting extreme lifestyles, diets and competition preps on their accounts. Their extremely lean bodies are built for the stage, and their lifestyles are great for bodybuilding competitions, but are NOT maintainable for everyday life.

Filtering out the fitspos can be tough, but there are certain athletes, coaches and experts with accounts that are dedicated to actually providing you with beneficial, science-backed information that you, a normal college human, will legitimately be able to implement into your lifestyle. Here are three great ones.

1. Sohee Lee, BA, CSCS, CSN (@soheefit)
Sohee Lee's page is dedicated to providing you fitness content for lifelong results. She posts a TON of informational content, workouts (that aren't batsh*t crazy), maintainable diet information, exercise tutorials... this chick also backs everything up with science and recently spoke at the International Society of Sports Nutrition conference.

She's legit. And she's dedicated to helping you.

?How to Feel Good in Your Skin? Many of us have spent far too long feeling uncomfortable in our bodies and picking ourselves apart. ? Here are 6 ways to feel good in your skin: o ?Wear clothes that fit you NOW. Don't squeeze yourself into jeans and tops that are too small for you. Don't be afraid to go up a size or two and wear outfits that flatter your physique - and flaunt it! o ?Focus on what your body can do. Celebrate that you can walk up several flights of stairs or carry all the groceries into your home without extra help. Need help? No thanks, I've got this! ? o ?Stop comparing yourself to others. Comparison is the thief of joy - we all know this! Keep your eyes on yourself and focus on making improvements over time. o ?Stop apologizing for the way you look. No one is perfect. What are you sorry for? Embrace your flaws; they make you unique. o ?Spend time around supportive people. You should be with people who lift you up, not break you down. Surround yourself with those who believe in you. o ?Repeat daily self-affirmations. You give power to your thoughts, and you tend to believe what you tell yourself. "I am strong, kind, and intelligent." "I can do anything I set my mind to." o There are enough insecurities and negative self-talk in this world. Fewer put-downs; more love. ? #feelgoodinyourskin #loveyourself #eatliftthrive

A post shared by Sohee Lee (@soheefit) on


?Grams of Protein, Carbs, and Fats in 100 Calories of Different Foods? Arranged in order from most protein to least protein per 100 calories, here's a sampling of different foods and their macros. ?A quick glance at the chart will give you a pretty good idea of what the predominant macronutrient is for each item. ? o If you're looking for excellent sources of protein, the foods on the left side ? of the graph are examples that fit the bill. ?Those on the right side should by no means be avoided, but keep in mind that they also contain a decent amount of carbs and fats. Note in particular how much fat peanut butter has relative to protein (I bring this up because some people mistakenly believe that peanut butter is packed with protein). ? o All of the above foods have their place in a well-rounded, nutrient-dense diet... but not all are great sources of protein! ?? #protein #eatliftthrive

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Tried out a new gym today with @bradschoenfeldphd @bretcontreras1 @team_gorman @leslie_teamgorman. We were blown away by the facility. Gotta love that! Full body pull day for me. Stuck to higher reps of everything and tried out some machines as well. Stiff-legged deadlift 100lbs x 10, 100lbs x 10 Tall-kneeling 1-arm cable pull-in 30lbs x 15ea, 30lbs x 15ea DB back extension 45lbs x 15, 45lbs x 15 Machine mid row 45lbs x 15, 45lbs x 15? Glute kickback machine 50lbs x 15 EZ bar pause hip thrust 70lbs x 20 Band pull-apart 30, 30 The row machine was... fun! And felt surprisingly smooth ?Wasn't crazy about the glute machine; felt it in my quads too much - but was good to try anyway. Next week, I'll bump up to 3 working sets of exercises. Trying out a higher volume block this time and really enjoying it so far. ? #eatliftthrive

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2. Jordan Syatt (@syattfitness)
Syatt is a world record-holding powerlifter and wildly successful coach, and his bio informs us that he's a 27th-Degree Black Belt in Chugging Coffee. This guy provides a TON of comical infographics about everything from food information and maintainable fitness strategies to goal setting and strength.

He's also a Harry Potter fan... and completely hilarious. He's incredibly knowledgeable and responds to any and all questions that his 138K followers have. Check this dude out.

?HOW TO DO FITNESS RIGHT? - ?The scale is a fickle, prickly, devilishly manipulative little goblin. If you aren't careful it can control your emotions over seemingly insignificant things (like random numbers it spits in your face that could mean anything from you've gotta poop to you ate a bunch of salt). - ?The thing is...it doesn't have to control your emotions. It shouldn't. It's a stupid, stinky, hairy little goblin that doesn't know the difference between a toad and an owl and has no business dictating how you feel. - ?Doesn't matter if the scale goes up or down or left or right or smacks you in the face. The scale is a scale and the numbers it spits out should be used as a tool - not a definitive marker of progress. - ?See, I think people run into trouble when they associate their weight with how well they're doing. When they look at the numbers as a ? or ? depending on what direction they moved from the day prior. Logically you know you shouldn't think like this. But emotions aren't logical and it's easy to let them get the best of us. - ?Listen. I know it's easier said than done but I want you to actively and consciously try to disassociate your emotions from the scale. I'm not saying to toss it out altogether (though, you can if you want to). But what I am saying is to keep the numbers on the scale separate from your emotions regardless of whether they go up or down. Acknowledge them for what they are - numbers - and move on to focus on other, more important, markers of progress. - ?How you look in the mirror. How your clothes fit. And, especially, how you feel. Because that's the most important of all. You can be the lightest you've ever been but feel like poop. And, let's be honest, what's the point of that. - ?Focus on you. How you feel. How you perform. What makes you happy and healthy and how to do it consistently over and over again. Because once you can do that...you already won. - #health #healthyfood #healthyeating #fitness #fitspo #fitfam #fitspiration #iifym #ifitfitsyourmacros #flexibledieting #weightloss #weightlossfood #weightlossmotivation #fatlossmotivation #fatloss #mindset #nutritioncoach #alwaysoptimal #syattfitness

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?ACTIVATE YOUR GLUTES? - ?Most problems in this world can be solved by a cup coffee and/or a great tush. So I figure, I can't give everyone a hot a mug o'joe but I might ass well (see what I did there) toss some ideas out on how to build a hell of a tush. - ?Glute bridges and hip thrusts are great, but they don't hit your "side butt" very well which can keep your butt from getting as strong and defined as you might want. That's why I like these, Advanced Side Lying Clams. Because they force your butt to work in the "frontal plane" which lights the hell outa your glute medius (aka side butt) and hits your butt in a way most lifters neglect entirely. - ?You can do these anytime you want (warm-up, superset, cool down, rest day, etc). I prefer to do them as part of my warmup (2-3 sets of 5-8 per leg is plenty) and on rest days as well. Either way, several sets of 5-12 per leg is more than enough to strengthen the hell outa your bum while getting it more defined. Just remember, quality over quantity. I'd rather you do fewer reps with perfect form than more reps with "eh? form. Always. - ??I hope this helps and, as always, max any questions let know. - #butt #buttworkout #leg #legs #legday #lowerbody #lower #workout #workouttime #lifting #liftheavy #girlswholift #strengthcoach #fitness #fitfam #fitspo #fitspiratiom #fitness#alwaysoptimal #syattfitness

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3. Carter Good/Envision Being Thin (@cartergood)
If you want valuable fitness information, this guy's page is a goldmine. He posts infographics about any and everything related to sustainable fitness. Calorie comparisons. How to measure intake. How to spot fitness scams. How to track your progress. Just. Follow. Him.

Here's an excellent post by my good pal, @syattfitness. # Jordan and I have very similar views on fat loss nutrition--whole foods & patience are key. His description of the original post is spot on too... # FROM JORDAN: "When it comes to fat loss there is NOTHING you can buy -- no pill or powder or potion or doodad -- that will accelerate your fat loss more than the 4 things outlined in this post.?-??It's not sexy or fun or exciting or marketable because it's nice to *hope* there's a little known, powerful pill in the back corner of GNC that's going to burn the extra fat off your body once and for all...but, unfortunately, it doesn't exist.?-??Keeping in mind, if it did exist I would be all over it. If I could pay $99 for a bottle of fat burning pills you better believe I would. And as much as the supplement companies want us to believe there is a quicker, faster, easier way...there isn't. And the sooner we embrace that the sooner we can stop wasting money, time, and hope on useless supplements and start making real progress.?-??Fruits & Veggies >> I don't need to explain myself here. These are obviously important for fat loss and anyone who says otherwise (let's check comments section) is an ignoramus.?-??Fresh Protein >> A few posts back I explained the top 3 reasons why protein is king for fat loss. It keeps you full, helps build muscle, and has the highest thermic effect of all macronutrients. Go check that post for a detailed explanation.?-??Coffee >> because there's never a bad time for coffee. And it can, actually, blunt hunger and has a thermogenic effect.?-??Patience >> the most important of all...because you will NOT reach your goals in a week, month, or probably even a year. It takes a hell of a long time (and a metric ? ton of effort) to get where you want to be. So prepare for the long haul and get ready to enjoy the journey...because if you're just looking for the quick fix you're setting yourself up for failure." # Know someone who would benefit from this? Tag 'em Below! ??? # . . . #envisionbeingthin #weightloss #weightlossfood #weightlosstips #weightlosshelp #weightwatchers #weightlosscoach #weightlosscommunity #weightlosssupport

A post shared by Envision Being Thin (@cartergood) on

Here's a template I use with myself and clients for crafting quick, easy, healthy & filling weight loss meals! ?? - I'm all for having flexibility with diet ???, but I ALSO value simplicity... - As you probably know, losing weight is all about calorie balance consistently being in a calorie deficit ??... - Heck, you could follow a diet consisting of chocolate cupcakes & Mountain Dew, and STILL lose weight if you take in few enough calories! - But just because you CAN do that, doesn't mean that you SHOULD ?... - You see, there are other pieces to the diet puzzle--such as food quality, macronutrient ratios, micronutrient density, fiber content, fullness factor, and enjoyment--which all play an important role in a successful fat loss nutrition plan. - That's why I like to keep things simple 80-90% of the time and use this meal template. The only things I change are the specific foods I use for Carbs, Protein, & Veggies ? - When I'm using this template, I know without a doubt I'm getting plenty of protein, fiber, and micronutrients--all of which keep me full, happy, and satisfied ?? - Start using this meal template and I guarantee you'll have a much easier time dropping fat ? & creating weight loss friendly meals ? - Know someone who would benefit from this post? Tag 'em below! ??? - . . . #envisionbeingthin #weightloss #weightlossfood #weightlosstips #weightlosshelp #weightwatchers #weightlosscoach #weightlosscommunity #weightlosssupport #weightlossinspiration #dietmotivation #weightlossjourney #diet #dieting #dietfood #dietplan #ifitfitsyourmacros #iifym #flexiblediet #flexibledieting #calories #caloriecounting #healthydiet #fit #fitspo #fitfood #fitnessfood #fatloss #losingweight #healthyhabits

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Honorable mentions: Alan Aragon (@thealanaragon), The Prehab Guys (@theprehabguys), Dr. Jacob Harden (@dr.jacob.harden), William Grazione (@wgrazifpapro)

This is not a comprehensive list, and there are a ton of people out there who dedicate their lives to delivering real fitness content. Don't be intimidated by the millions upon millions of flawless-looking athletes repping six different fitness brands. Just learn the real stuff, and find a lifestyle that works for you and your college life.

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When Fear Of Alcoholism Ruins The Party

Recognizing you have a problem ... before there's a problem.

My mom has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember. Currently, she's sixty years old, and I'm twenty-one. Now is the most socially acceptable time for me to drink, and I'm already realizing that I have a problem.

Moderation doesn't always come easily to me. One drink turns into two, which snowballs into six. I'm a pleasant drunk, so my friends have no reason to call me out. I haven't royally fucked up by getting a DUI or anything like that, but my inability to pace myself has recently become a red flag. It's possible that alcohol and I are a bad mix.

Heavy drinking is sort of like smoking cigarettes. It looks cool when you're young and attractive, but as you age, the negative effects on your health can sully any inkling of glamour. When it comes to alcohol addiction, we often don't recognize the problem until it's too late. I don't want to wait until I destroy my liver before realizing there's a problem. Despite what movies, TV, ads, music, and college culture itself have said about people my age, I am not invincible. So what is a college student with a love of partying and a family history of alcoholism to do?


Source: CollegeMagazine

Get over the fear of socializing while sober. When you're sober and you walk into a room full of drunk people, you may feel obligated to start chugging drinks. I've convinced myself that I can't function in these settings without a few drinks, but that's just not true. If you allow those first few minutes of awkwardness to pass, letting your sober self get settled in, you may actually enjoy yourself more than if you were drunk. I've tried this out a couple times and found that sober me is just as fun as drunk me. Not to talk down alcohol, but you don't need it to have a good time around drunk people. In fact, sober you is more perceptive of your friends' debauchery, so be sure to take plenty of pics!

College life and heavy drinking seem to go hand-in-hand. But when an individual with a family history of alcoholism lives in a culture that over-normalizes drinking, there may be a problem. Just because something works for other people your age, doesn't mean it's right for you. Time will tell how I'll manage my problems with alcohol. I'm seeking counseling to get advice on how to deal with this, and I would encourage any one else in my situation to do so as well. If I learn to pace myself, that's great, but I think it's best for me to stop drinking altogether.

When it comes to any lifestyle choice, do what's right for you. Understand your risk factors before they become a problem. Have as much fun as you can while also taking care of yourself.

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